Being Refined

It has been a while since I have written anything which is a testimony to how busy things have been around here as well as to my own lack of making it a priority.

I have been thinking a lot about the Refining process and how you have to go through the fire in order for that to happen. Fire is captivating we love to be near it. We love to watch it but we learn from a young age you don't want to be in it. It hurts, it burns and it leaves its mark.

How true is that of the way that we look at the fire of God the process of him refining us. We like to get close to it just enough to feel the power that is there. We like to watch it happen in other peoples lives as God consumes them. For our own life we put it off as long as possible. We fear what mark it will leave even though we always come out better than before, we do not come out the other side the same.

Throughout my time of working with Refined Beauty God has been Refining what we do. He has taken us through the very process our name speaks to. He has brought it back to the beginning. Youth with a mission Pittsburgh was founded through a summer youth leadership program called Joshua Generation. Teens would come for 17 days and experience God like they never had before. They would be trained in who God is and evangelism for 7 days and then go out into cities in the US and around the world and share their God and their experience with him in those places.

We tried to start Refined Beauty with a DTS but God had other plans. He is Refining us and bringing us back to our roots. SO for our first training school and outreach we are rocking it Joshua Generation style. We have been reduced and Refined and we are so excited to train up the next generation in what God says about their beauty and how to use the power of beauty and touch to reach anyone and everyone.

I could not be more excited about the mark that God has left on this ministry after all it is totally his to brand as he would chose we just have to constantly be reminded of that.

If you know anyone who would be interested in this summer youth program shoot an email to refinedbeautyywam@gmail.com
Thanks so much!

What the Heck are we Doing??

While most of you who read this already know a lot of what is happening with Refined Beauty I just wanted to take a moment to share what is going on and the things that God has been speaking to us.

So due to a lack of students and a need for more preparation time we are not running a training school in March as originally planned. So we will be doing some more recruiting as well as ministering and doing outreaches using cosmetology.

We want to establish 3 consistent outreaches that the students that do come to the school can just walk into and be a part of without a lot of effort. Due to the fact that the ultimate goal of this school is to begin a ministry having consistent outreaches throughout the city is really important.

Throughout this time and this process God has been reminding us to be completely dependent on him and his vision. When we have God sized visions we have to rely completely on him in order to see it completed. The idea for the Refined Beauty DTS and the Beauty from ashes ministry is definitely from God that has been confirmed time and time again. As we began to so more ministry and share more of our vision with people we began to have a desire to make it happen no matter the cost. We were diving in head first and doing everything we could. While this seems like a great thing in the end we lost sight of the fact that while this is our life, it is only our life because God has ordained it to be. We need, need, need to remain at his feet, to know where he is taking us and this ministry.

So please be praying for us as we go forward. That he would lead us and that we would remain surrendered. That everything we do would not be in our own strength but in his.

So Cold it burns

I am sitting at the computer and have been trying to write this post on and off for a good portion of the day. I write for a minute and then delete what I have written.

Words are eluding me today I know what is on my head and in my heart but the ability to communicate is just not coming to me. But here goes nothing I apologize in advance if it is a but scattered.

So due to the ministries that I have been involved in and the ministry with women and girls of all walks of life this concept of being "hot" and "sexy" and all of our movies and commercials and TV and everything else that promotes this "hot". This hot is so much a part of our lives that we as christians even forget how damaging it is.. 

It is all so empty and cold. Sex and being sexy is meant to be this intimate and personal thing and yet so often since the beginning of time it becomes this supply and demand mentality. Which is so far from God's design that rather than us seeing the sex industry as a perverted damaging thing we view his design as unrealistic or unnatural. 

Have you ever touched something that was frozen or super cold and metal, and had that burning sensation? When things are that cold and if you let it stay that way you go numb and then get frostbite which can lead to the loss of appendages or even limbs.

That is what this version of "hot" is. Rather than actually being hot it is so cold that it burns. we then become so numb and desensitized that we forget that we are loosing parts of who we were created to be. My encouragement and purpose in this is to pray for those that are loosing who they are. That are allowing the cold to trick them into thinking it is heat. For the men and women caught up in this industry or this lifestyle. Because while they believe themselves to be burning with passion the reality is that they have severe frostbite. 

Keep your way Pure

I wanted to take some time to share with you about purity. Last week I was doing research on this topic and all that happened was an insane amount of frustration.

There are organizations that promote purity and sell purity rings and all the cheesy stuff that while cute sometimes makes me gag a bit. Then there are people who say well purity is impossible so lets just teach safe sex we don’t want our kids to do stupid things out of ignorance. Then there are people that just teach abstinence and how while there are other “safe sex” options that this is really the best way to insure that you do not get an STD or pregnant. The truth is abstinence is great and I support it but abstinence is NOT purity. Keeping our “little” girls and boys away from actually having sex does not mean we have succeeded in keeping them pure. In a world where pornography and the question of “how far is too far?” run rampant not having sex is a very small part of true purity.

Why can’t we just be real with our youth and with ourselves. True purity can only happen when we are in relationship with Jesus. No one is strong enough to stay pure apart from him, nor is there any real reason to stay pure apart from him. Not just a “Christian” or a “good kid” but pursuing Jesus and desiring his will above all else in our lives. Until we and the youth we are speaking to are finding identity in Christ how can we expect them to stop looking else where to answer the question “who am I?”.

Now do not get me wrong I don’t think that talking to your kids about purity is pointless. I do not think that we should just give up on biblical values if our youth aren’t reading their bibles. I am just saying I slept through as many purity talks as I listened to when I was in middle school. I have owned 4 purity rings and lost them all. I have made bracelets and boundaries and everything else that a girl who grows up in the church is supposed to do. But I also went to an inner city public school so I learned about safe sex, how to put on a condom and what birth control was before middle school ever happened. I had friends who lost their virginity in middle school. I was bombarded with information from both sides. Then when I was 13 I gave my life to Jesus. That summer I heard the purity talk that stuck with me. I set my boundaries and my standards for any dating relationships I might have. I have stuck to those standards and boundaries I am 24 and I have never been kissed. I am a purity poster child in some ways. But I am not naive and never have been. I watched as my friends gave “it” up. I watched as their hearts were broken and innocence was lost. Whether it was through sex, emotions or other avenues, they no longer believed themselves to be “pure”. Through all of my observing I knew that if I ever thought I was strong enough to “handle” a compromising situation it was already over for me. The song Jesus loves me spoke to me so much that first summer of my relationship with God “I am weak but he is strong”. I knew I couldn’t stay “pure” no matter how strong everyone around me believed I was. Weakness has, is and always will be my only source of strength.

The ONLY I repeat the ONLY reason that anyone stays “pure” is through relationship with Jesus. Purity through just not having sex is kind of a joke. As I said before communicating biblical morals and views to our Youth is so important and I do not want to belittle that. But make sure that you are communicating to them that we obey Jesus because we love him because we have a relationship with him. Because our identity is in him and he knows what is best for us. Purity is not a goal or a rule it is an entire lifestyle, it is who we are called to be. Pure, Holy, set apart. Not because we are strong and can do that but because Jesus can and does do that for us.

More than tipsy

Ok so after an extended break I am returning to my brides. Now once again looking and taking the photo in looking through the bride of Christ glasses.

My first reaction at this photo and many of the others that I saw of drunk brides was laughter. This woman looks ridiculous or white trash. She is by herself with the bottle and cigarette plopped down on the porch getting wasted. 

Then I think of how sad it is. Why isn’t she with her friends or her new husband. Why is she getting plastered doesn’t she want to remember this night. It is supposed to be the happiest night of her life right?

Now here is the thing I could go off on a rant of how useless I think being literally drunk is but then many of us would just think well I don’t get drunk so I am good to go. I am so not this bride.

The thing is our muddy bride she knew what she was doing. She knew who she was called to be but wanted to hide it. She wanted to blend in. This bride has allowed the world to poison her and cause her to forget who she is. She has been drinking the sin long enough and often enough to believe that there is nothing better for her. That this is it and this is enough and this is fun. She desires so much to feel something and then remember nothing. That way she can trick herself and everyone around her that she is happy and living a life that everyone should want to live, When the reality is her life is empty and she has forgotten how to fill it. 

How many times do we allow ourselves to “forget” that what we are doing is sin. We live in a sort of ignorance and call it bliss. God wants all of us every part he wants to show the “drunken” areas of our lives and take them away. The amazing thing, the very best thing about when Jesus takes something away is he does not leave an empty space in us he fills it with more of himself. By showing us another facet of his character and through that drawing us into a deeper place of worship and understanding of who he is and why his presence is the only place we should desire to be. He does not want us to forget who we were or forget any part of our lives who we were before or where he has brought us. He just wants to love us to be our bridegroom. To show us we were created to bring Glory to him and when we are doing that, then we are full of Joy which goes so much deeper than being fake happy. He shows us how much fun life can be with him.

Wait for it!

So since I have not shared any beauty tips with you lately I will share a mask recipe that we used on our promotion trip that is simple and works very well. During this winter season many of you might find that your skin is a bit on the dry side and this mask is perfect for that.

All you do is take one egg white and 1 to 2 table spoons of Greek yogurt. (this should be enough for about 4 uses or 4 people) Whip these 2 ingredients together and then put a thin layer on your face. Wait about 5 to 10 min then wash it off with warm water. You’re skin will feel soft and look great!

Eggs have protein which is good for your skin and the yogurt is a great source of moisture. I should mention that you need to use plain yogurt no fruit or flavoring.

Masks are one of those things that require patience and self control. As you sit there with your face itching but unable to touch it because there is stuff on your face.
The age old saying of all good things are worth waiting for proves itself true in this situation.

Waiting is sometimes one of the hardest things that we have to do. We know something is going to happen at the end of our waiting. Sometimes we know what the outcome is like fully baked cookies, boiling water or baby soft skin. Other times, many times in my relationship with God I have no idea where I am going or what I am waiting/ preparing for. One of the biggest traps I fall into is that the best thing that I am going to do with my life is just around the corner. That what I am doing right now is great and all but the best is yet to come, that my life’s calling is just around the corner. Or that once this ministry really takes off that is when my life will really start. The fact is that my calling is to be God’s daughter and servant and the love of his life and reason for his death. If I am living a life following him every step of the way, then I am living out my calling. Making the most of every “waiting period” The dreams and passions that he give us are an amazing bonus. He created us to be his and then he gives us gifts and talents to use. To bring life to ourselves and others. Or the all too common waiting for our husbands. That once he comes then life, ministry and family will fall into place. We tell ourselves that we are living full lives right now that we are “content”, that we know a man cannot complete us only God does. Yet still there is a part of us that thinks that although the man will not complete us, that the lifestyle a husband brings will bring us into who we were created to be somehow. Don’t get me wrong I want to get married someday as much as the next girl but sometimes I get caught up in waiting for this man who will bring this life that God has promised rather than living the life that he is calling me to right now.

Someday, waiting and in God’s time are dangerous phrases for us as women.
While they are all true we get trapped by them.
Someday every knee will bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord. So waiting to tell those in your life about Jesus in not an option. Because God’s time for you to live out your calling as his daughter is now!

Desperation

So I have one other trip story to share before I resume with the beauty tips and bridal musings.

It was Wednesday and we were had been busy most of the day going from promoting on a college campus to a meeting with a salon owner and that night we were going to be speaking to youth group girls about beauty. At this point I was tired and I had not been able to spend any time by myself with Jesus or otherwise. That is the nature of these kinds of trips. So we had a couple of hours to kill and decided to try and find a coffee shop to sit in and write notes to the youth group girls and just to do some more planning of what we were going to say. Well we didn’t find a coffee shop we found a diner and sat down to continue writing. As I sat there I began complaining to God about how I had not gotten to spend time with him and how it was not my fault and I was tired and blah blah blah. I sat for a minute then thought oh man if I listen to God now he is going to tell me all of the times I could have spent with him and how I am feeling this way because of myself and I have no one else to blame.

So after preparing myself and feeling humble enough and guilty enough I decided to really pray and seek God and ask forgiveness. Now I don’t know why I was surprised by this. It is not as if I do not know that God loves me and wants to spend time with me. It is not as if I do not know that repentance is meant to be a joyful thing and that when we give it all over to him he is waiting to speak to us. And yet in that diner as I asked God to show up and speak to me on behalf of the girls we would be speaking to and myself. As he spoke I sat there in awe and felt chills.

I was lead to a passage of scripture I am sure I have read before but never really studied until now it is Psalm 45. It talks about the king and his beautiful bride. The whole Psalm is praising this king and expressing to this bride how lucky she is to be loved so completely by this king. How she needs to leave everything she knows and follow him. That this is good and right and joyful even.

As I sat there thinking about how much God loves us and how everything that I get to do for the Lord all of the things I get to lay at his feet for him to take care of because he loves me. I could not help but be amazed at his complete love and my complete dependence. Before the Youth Group service that night we prayed in the car and all I could think of, the one thought that dominated my mind was I am totally and utterly dependent on God who totally and utterly loves me enough to speak to me even in the midst of my sin and shortcomings. This Refined Beauty ministry is a sensitive thing for so many women. We want to go into the dark places of the world and of women’s hearts and the only way that we will be able to be effective in that is if we remain dependent on him. I have never been more sure of that than I am in this moment. So please pray with us and for us as we continue that everything that we do would be lead by him, and that all we do would be only for his glory.